9.28.2006

Jeff the Great outlaws 'intelligent footwear'!


As many of you know, on Monday I left my employer of the last 5 1/2 years. I've got a few things in the works and if I haven't spoken with you already, I will soon.

But I have a lot of time on my hands now, as you can imagine. I took my dog on a walk today down to the post office to mail some thank you notes. I'm a little over a mile away from home when the rear air bag of my Nike Air Max 360's pops! Now this is no ordinary shoe...the first ever to completely eliminate the mid-sole. For those of you who are footwear rookies...the midsole provides about all of the support in a traditional shoe. So I finish my walk....another 1.5 miles with a left shoe that collapses down the the pavement in the heal. My entire leg is still killing me!

Now this couldn't of happened when I was still with said employer, oh no! No free replacement or employee store discount for me. Full price if I want a new pair. Do you know when the last time was that I paid full price for a pair of shoes? I don't know either.

I swear Mr. PHK must order the placement of some fancy computer chip in the heal of every employee's shoe. That way when you leave the company, they screw you! All I can picture is Knight, in the voice of the Soup Nazi from Sienfeld, saying "No Shoes For You!" and flipping the secret switch that blows my air bag!

In the meantime, I am excited to buy my first pair of shoes from another brand in more than 5 years. I've been wanting a pair of Keen's and will buy them the minute I get my first pay check from a new job! This company is hot and if they keep doing things right, they'll dominate both the outdoor and brown shoe markets in a matter of years. Here is a pic of one of their most popular styles:

-Jeff the Great

9.24.2006

Jeff the Great says "What were they thinking?"

I just found the blog of a friend of mine, and read a hilarious post. Could have copied the text here, but want to give him credit for it.

Unintentionally Worst Company URL's

Enjoy,

-Jeff the Great

9.23.2006

Jeff the Great takes over Starbucks!


I am up at 1am blogging tonight because I had a venti coffee at around 9:30pm. You might be saying, "dude, you could have gotten a decaf!" Well, I'll get to that in a minute.

I am blown away by how poorly Starbucks seems to be managed these days. They have the world in their hands but are pulling a Munson (if you've seen King Pin, you know what I am talking about).

I used to walk into a Starbucks and the friendly employees behind the counter knew my name and my drink.....I never waited more than 30 seconds. Now days it's so much different. The status quo is to first wait in line for 2,3, even 4 minutes. On a good day, when I get to the counter I am greeted with a "hi..." then a long pause. Most days it's just the long pause and a stare. No, "what can I make for you today" or "good morning sir, what drink would you like?" Just a look of entitlement, like I'll give them my order regardless so why bother with the pleasantries? They are lucky that their coffee is so damn good that I still suffer through the bullshit described above.

Tonight, on my way to help out with the high school youth group at church, I decide I needed some caffeine to help keep me awake until midnight. I stopped by the Starbucks on the way, as this summer they advertised "now open 24 hours!" Of course, I got there and they weren't open. Would it kill them to give it a few months before throwing in the towel?

I travel a few miles out of the way to a Starbucks I know is open. I wait in line, and am greeted with the same blank stare and sense of entitlement that I described earlier. I order my half decaf, half regular drip coffee and am told that they hadn't changed out the old pot of decaf as they are required to do every hour. "Did I still want it," she asked. Well, no, not after what you just told me! She reluctantly tells me she can sell me a half caf americano for the same price, but after my smart ass comment she tells me it's on the house.

Now, do you think they made my half caf americano correctly? Of course not, the put a decaf on the bar, and when I questioned if it was correct the friendly barista just about bit my head off for questioning him! After it sat unclaimed for nearly 5 minutes, he asked what I ordered so he could make it up. I wanted my half caffeine for god sake....That's why I was there!

Well, to make a long story not so long, I asked if I could just have my original drink as they surely had brewed a new pot of coffee while I was waiting for my free americano. He stared at the timer for an unusually long amount of time, then proceeded to poor my drink. When he handed it to me I asked if it was the same old pot of coffee from nearly 1o minutes ago when I had ordered and indeed I was. "So what do you want then" he asked. "I JUST WANT A HALF DECAF SOMETHING, IS THAT TOO HARD TO UNDERSTAND?!" I asked.

Since then I've been wired all night. I think the asshole made me a quadzillion, regular caffeine americano. Son of a bitch....I hate that place (until tomorrow morning when I want the best cup of coffee this side of Paris). O well....nite.

-Jeff the Great

9.20.2006

Jeff the Great says "You are the company you keep"



They say that people look like their dogs. People select dogs that remind them of themselves. Tonight, while at an HOA meeting, I had the pleasure of being described as a pit bull. Not in a bad way, as a compliment, I guess. I just never thought of myself that way.

Guess I just thought of myself as more of a German Shepard. You know, big, strong, smart, loyal, hairy, etc. But the pit bull is thought of as the most terrifying and deadliest bread. Known to kill other dogs and animals, not to mention the occasional kid. The only trait I can think of that we have in common is a constant desire to eat!

So what are you? Do you think others describe you the same as you think of yourself? Is there even a dog that encompasses who you are? I'm looking forward to what others have to say.

If you're not sure what kind of dog you are, take this online test.

-Jeff the Great

9.19.2006

Jeff the Great authorizes new media!

Some of you already know that I love to read news on the internet. I've even been known to send link after link when I see something I think you'll like. So, thought I'd share with you the various sources I get my news from. Hopefully you'll find some of these as interesting and informative as I have:

News Sites
MSNBC.com
NY Times Technology page
KGW- local television news

Commentary & Informative
Startup Journal
Realestate Journal
College Journal
Career Journal

Blogs
Playbooks & Profits
Mike Jones
Blog Maverick
Nau Thought Kitchen

-Jeff the Great

9.17.2006

Jeff the Great single handedly fixes Ford Motor Co.


Ford Motor Company recently announced that they've hired Alan Mulally away from Boeing to become their new CEO. Along with his $18.5 million signing bonus, he'll be looking to cut over 10,000 jobs (much like he did at Boeing).

In light of these recent announcements, I've been thinking this is the perfect opportunity for this American icon to re-shape their image and regain dominance.

Ford should take this opportunity to be an industry leader and announce that they will become a hybrid only manufacturer. That's right, nearly every Ford vehicle would be a hybrid with the exception of the Mustang, F-Series trucks, and the Expedition. From 2008 on, every Explorer, every Focus, every Ranger, every Escape, every Fusion, every Freestyle, and...well... You get the point.

Just imagine the change in public image. Most consumers would happily buy a hybrid if a) they didn't cost more and b) were more available. Ford would quickly be known as THE hybrid car company. Often all it takes is one company to step out and take a stand. Additionally, if Ford made this move many other car makers would be pressured to follow suit. Cost would come down, availability would increase, and demand would be both met and created. Your main economic forces are taken care of.

So what if? If you needed a new SUV and the Ford Explorer came standard as a hybrid for little to no extra cost, would you go for a test drive? With over 10,000 people being laid off, bonds rated as junk, sales tumbling, and profit non-existent, what do they have to loose? It's now or never.

-Jeff the Great

Jeff the Great hands Oregon a win on silver platter.

They did it! My Ducks beat Oklahoma in the biggest game of the last 2 decades! Now the bad part: fans, players, and coaches will have to hear about the controversy for years to come. At least for the next 3 1/2 months, that is.

If you haven't heard already, the national media and Sooner fans everywhere are claiming the official's blew a call on the late 4th quarter on-side kick by the ducks. Most, if not all, of these people think they know more than the officials. They think they saw something the official's didn't. They think they had camera angles that the officials didn't, and anything else that makes them feel better. Most importantly, they think that the chaotic image paused and shown over and over again shows an Oregon Ducks hand touching the ball. Because only 1 player on the field was wearing black gloves, right? Only one player on the field has black skin, right? Of course it was a Duck, he's the only one that fits the description.

If it is so obvious that a Duck touched the ball, why did the official choose these exact words:

"After further review, there is conclusive evidence the receiving team touched the ball . . ."

If you disagree, jump to this blog , read it & weep.

-Jeff the Great

UPDATE: The Pac-10 commissioner responded to demands from the OU president. The officiating staff has been suspended for 1 game and a formal apology has been made. Too bad the Pac-10 commissioner HAS NO BALLS! Doesn't he realize bad calls are made in almost any game? He failed to mention the bad calls (one inparticular) that went the way of OU. No apology about that. If you want to let the Pac-10 commissioner know what you think, email him at thansen@pac-10.org (If he's changed it, try t_hansen@pac-10.org).

9.14.2006

Jeff the Great starts the worlds greatest blog!

Everyone's doing it, right? Figured I'd try the whole 'blog' thing. I can't promise it'll be exciting but at least it will entertain me.

I welcome all....family, friends, strangers, colleagues, etc. Thanks for stopping by.

-Jeff the Great